After more than 50 bridal showers, 30 bachelorette parties, 80 weddings and 15 baby showers, it's not about you, my friends, any more. It's all about me. Check my blog for clues on whom I'd like to live happily ever after with. Each day, you need to think -- "Hmmm...would he be right for Lisa?" Then, when the right guy comes to mind, set me up! But, let's keep the contest between us girls (and select boys that are allowed to view my desperation).

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Am I a cougar?

As my 35th birthday approaches, I've been wondering what will change? Maybe nothing except that every time I have to fill out my age on any form or survey, I now have to mark the "old box" of 35 - 44!

It also get me started thinking about older women dating younger men, something I really like to do! When are you too old to do that any more? Is it this new age bracket that I'm reaching?

And then I was thinking about what it means to be a "cougar." Am I fast-approaching "cougar" status? That seems impossible. I don't feel old (well sometimes I do). I don't think I can pull of a Mrs. Robinson-type seduction move at this point in my life, but according to the urban dictionary, I just may be a cougar. Crap. How did this happen? How is it that I'm almost 35 and have rarely dated anyone over 30. Sure, many of them have turned 30 by now, but they were never in their 30s when I dated them! (aw...remember Scott Bailey?)

Lately, I've been feeling out of touch with the 20 somethings so how, you ask, do I date one? Well, for the first several months, you're just getting to know someone and it's fun and age doesn't really matter as you like a lot of the same things. But now, another milestone is approaching, a year of dating the red head! And, I can't help but wonder if soon, he'll wake up and think he's dating a "cougar" - a woman on the prowl for younger love. Maybe he's already had that thought!

Since many of my readers are women also approaching or already over the hill (35+), I'd love to hear what you think. Would you consider yourself a cougar if you were in my shoes?

And, for anyone reading that is in their 20s, give a girl ("cougar") some advice! What's it like to be under 30? I fear that I no longer remember!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

So glad I'm not SARAH MARSHALL

Breakups are hard. No one is going to challenge you on that. But this guy...he had it real bad for Sarah Marshall. On your way to work, you learn that his mom hates her, she looks fat in her jeans and he is so over her!

For those of you wondering who the hell Sarah Marshall is, you should go to the site and read about how badly she messed this guy up.

It's pretty funny and definitely going straight to DVD!

Seriously, have you all been seeing these signs all over the city?

Monday, January 21, 2008

Woman are crazy

The other day I caught a few minutes of The Eric & Kathy Show and was reminded that women are crazy.

For those of you that do not know of this morning radio show, I'll give you an overview. Women in Chicago love this show! It's hugely successful among women women, 25 - 45. I know this because I buy radio on behalf of my clients and advertising on this show does not come cheap.

Eric & Kathy are the main characters - both are happily married (the second time around) and have children - anyone that listens to the show knows that Eric's wife is Jen and Kathy's husband is Burt. Kathy had a boob job and Eric went to the University of Iowa (my almamater) and has twins. Barry (a nice man from Wheaton) with a really deep voice does the news and Melissa does the traffic and weather. Cynthia was the intern but is now a full-time player on the show. And, I mean player. Both Melissa & Cynthia are single and their single life is often (very often) the topic of the morning talk show. They send them on dating escapades, set them up on dates and are always taking calls on what these single ladies should do!

Anyway, men, if you listen to the show, you'll never admit it. Women, if you listen, you love it!

The segment that I caught was Eric & Kathy taking calls from single women who were calling in and admitting how far their obsession with getting married had taken them. I mean, I do author a blog entitled "Find a Husband for Lisa," but all I wanted was to get some dates. These women had magazine subscriptions to bridal magazines. Some even had wedding dresses already purchased and hanging in their closets! I found it really frightening. Then, I imagined that they were probably in their 30s like me :(

Let me tell you something about me...
I have never flipped through a bridal magazine. I have never even tried on a wedding dress. I don't own a veil. I have not reserved a reception hall and I don't have a favorite florist on call. I don't know if there will be a live band or a DJ. I don't know what color I'll be accenting with and if there will be slipcovers for the chairs.

After listening to female callers, I I want to get married? I mean, they acted like that was all normal. Dreaming of their wedding day to the point that they half planned it! They already knew who would be in their bridal party too. I have done none of those things, but then again...there is this blog!

I feel crazy for not being crazy! Does that make any sense?

Monday, December 10, 2007

I have been such a slacker

Thanks for calling me out on my inability to keep my blog going! So, here are some updates as to what has been going on with me and the red head:
- Only 2 centipedes killings since Halloween (the red head took care of both)
- I have met the red head's family
- I went car shopping for entire Saturday with the red head and had to play the role of "significant other" for all the slimy car salesman (one of whom suggested that in a few years I'd be back buying a mini van for the little ones!)
- I dog sat with the red head for his sister's humongous dogs in the suburbs!
- I let the red head participate in one of my hurry date parties (big mistake – you never want to watch your boyfriend meet a bunch of single girls – even if it's only for four minutes!)

I'm sure there's more, but it's been so long since I've been on my own blog, I don't want to bore you with all my updates!

But, as far as the "reveal" goes...he didn't really have much to say. I didn't know what to expect, but I was pretty sure that he'd find it amusing. Since the reveal, he continues to send me text messages and emails that read something like, "Dear Blog, I killed centipedes at my girlfriend's house. I'm nice" or "Dear Blog, My girlfriend should make me dinner tonight. I like tacos." I don't think he's actually gone so far as to write his own blog, but you never can be sure.

More later (I promise).

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

The reveal

Tonight, I am showing "the red head" the blog. It slipped. I made some comment about having a blog and realized that it was not something that I had ever really planned on sharing (at least not in the first few months of dating). I'm sure he'll be thrilled to know that it's entitled, "FIND A HUSBAND 4 LISA!"

The good news is that he is not someone that I met through efforts of this blog! He also knows that I affectionately refer to him as "the red head" so he won't be offended by that either (at least I don't think so).

Where to go from here? I'm not sure.

I have accepted a new part-time gig with a company called HurryDate, which does provide hours of entertaining dating stories, just not ones about me and all my woes. Basically, I run speed dating parties in Chicago for singles aged 24 - 60! So, if you know anyone that you think would want to attend a speed dating party, let me know!

Also, if you have thoughts on where I should take my blog, let me know. If you want, I will continue to tell you how things proceed with "the red head." Just because we are dating, does not mean a marriage is in the works. I have plenty to write about, just not sure you all are interested in hearing it! Lemme know...

Tuesday, October 02, 2007


Who says that to the girl they are dating? And, what am I supposed to do with that piece of information?

I'm a girl.
I love Valentine's Day! Well, I say that now when there is the potential of a V-day date. Hmmmmm....let's see what I said about v-day earlier this year.
Oh, I remember now. It was when I had a stalker from the auto show sending me texts of love. Gross.

Back to the current situation...
The red head mentions that he thinks Valentine's Day is stupid and that he doesn't celebrate. We're in the car so I turn up the radio. I need to think through my response. Guess I should forget about Sweetest Day later this month. Pretty sure, he didn't grow up with a mom that celebrates everything. We aren't Irish, but I get a present every St. Patrick's Day!

Fast forward to later this same day...
He can't find his keys so we're basically turning his place upside down looking for them. I enter the "disaster area." A non-functional office that is really the dumping ground for everything! It is in this very room that I find...
Seriously. You know those dumb books that say things like, "Good for one night of snuggling" or, "Good for a game of strip poker?" They are super cheesy and just wrong, but there they sit. Untouched. Collecting dust, unredeemed. Good thing the have no expiration dates!

Then, I am reminded of another time that I found "love coupons" in my boyfriend's house. Do guys hang onto to these "gifts"? What does he think that he is going to redeem one with me? "Hey Lisa, I have a coupon for a night of passion, what do you think?"
Needless to say, I took 'em, put 'em in my purse. It doesn't appear that any have been used, thank God or I'd probably puke.

Just waiting for the right time to redeem one? Maybe Valentine's Day?

Monday, September 17, 2007

Was I the only one that didn't know he was gay?

I was cleaning out some old files on my computer and came across some old bf pictures. This one startled me. I dated a gay man. His identity has been masked, but many of you knew him. Dear God, what was I thinking?

Then it got me thinking...

When I look back a few years (all the way back to 2004), I remember dating him and how the whole time I knew something was wrong. Now, I know. He doesn't actually like girls. We had so much in common from our love for One Tree Hill to shopping to owning lots of pairs of shoes. It's all so clear now.

I think I'm at that phase now, where I'm comparing the new boy (the red head) to other bfs. Everybody does it so don't judge me, it's normal. And, I can tell you that he's not gay. He hates shopping, loves camping, doesn't even know what One Tree Hill is and in my opinion, does not own enough pairs of shoes.